By Toni Gardner, RN Martinez
I got home about 1:30 in the morning on a Monday night and was back at work on Tues. morning. I got off the plane in Oakland and caught the East Bay Connection to Martinez. I cried the whole time. I think I was just grieving in general for those who are suffering from these hurricanes, the lack of organization, the feelings of having not done enough, and the relief to be home. The next morning at work a co-worker asked me about the trip and I immediately started to cry again.
It took me a few days to integrate my life here in California with my experiences there in Louisiana. I can understand now what it's like for soldiers to come back from the war and attempt to integrate back into society as if nothing ever happened.
I know you asked for a story and I have one ( if not many). A couple of times I took care of this young African-American man (26yrs) with a gun shoot wound. He was in isolation due to VRE and C-diff. His Mother stayed in the room with him, helped change his sheets, wiped his backside(he couldn't turn due to the nature of his wound) and generally took care of him. At one point I asked her the history of why they were there.
She began with telling me that about two years ago her husband of 22 years was driving home from work one night in New Orleans and his car broke down. He pulled over to the side of the freeway to check it out. A speeding motorist came by, hit him, and sped off. He died at the scene. Then two months before Katrina hit her son, the 26 yr old, was walking out of the gate at their house with his little son and nephew to go play basketball when he saw a drive-by shooter coming. He bent down to push the two little boys behind him and was shot himself. The bullet entered his abdomen, traveled down his thigh, and exited from his calf. He was placed in the hospital in New Orleans.
The police had been gathering evidence as to who the shooter was when Katrina hit. All evidence was lost, they will never know who it was, their house was lost, and the young man had to be transferred to Baton Rouge where they told him he would probably have to have his leg amputated at the hip. They trying to reduce the infection and promote the healing to save as much of his leg as possible. This Mother was so proud. She has five children and she said none of them had been into drugs or gangs and all of them had their high school diplomas. The rest of her children live in Houston and when her son’s leg had healed son after the amputation she was taking him to live with her other children in Texas.
She never complained about taking care of him everyday, sleeping on a little cramped cot, or all her losses. When I asked her how she was able to cope with all of the things that have happened to her in the last couple of years she just said she had a lot of faith and that was what got her through. Her son also seemed to cope rather well with the impending lose of his leg and privacy. He even at the end of the day thanked me for helping him and gave me a small smile. It was all I could do to not cry every time I looked at him.
Having two sons of my own I'm not sure if they or I could bear what this family has gone through with such courage and determination. Probably the hardest part was that this was not an isolated case. I will remember this Mother and her son always. Some people seem to get overloaded with tragedies. This family was an example. However, they didn't fall apart from it instead it seemed to make them stronger and more cohesive as a family. I felt it was an honor to take care of them.
Coming home has been difficult. I see patients and nurses complaining over little things and I get easily frustrated thinking about what others have had to deal with. I'm learning though that everything has its place and to just allow it to be.
